"oh yeah you guys use celcius"
Georges son calls from Hogwarts on the first day of school terrified and keeps asking if George is okay, he reassures him that everything is alright but asks why he would ask that. Georges son explains that he thought he had died because he could have sworn he had seen a ghost that looked just like him joking around with the older students
STOP DIS RIGHT NOW
first of all, fuck you
I came out as a queer during football practice when my coach was like “son, you’re having trouble throwing straight” and I replied “I’m also having trouble being straight”. It got very quiet and then coach just shook his head and said “throw the damn ball, Cooper”
i have been laughing for 3 million years
A writer for the new york times interviewed a series of people who had survived jumping off the golden gate bridge. Every person she interviewed admitted that about two thirds of the way down, they realized that every seemingly meaningless problem that caused them to jump was fixable.
Every single one.
THIS IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT